Why I Chose Not To Use A Pseudonym Online, Balancing Content On The Blog & Privacy

Whether you choose to use an online pseudonym or not is entirely your choice, I totally understand why some people choose to, looking back I’m not sure if I would have preferred to now. In this post I’ll be talking about why I ultimately chose not to use a pseudonym, how I’m trying to balance sharing bookish content and more lifestyle content as well as keeping certain aspects of my life private. Privacy is important friends, particularly because not everything needs to be shared online.

Let’s Talk Bookish is a weekly meme hosted by Rukky @ Eternity Books and Dani @ Literary Lion. Where we discuss certain topics, share our opinions, and spread the love by visiting each other’s posts.

I stumbled across this meme whilst blog hopping…I did get round to snooping at some of the blogs everyone’s been nominating. Rukky was one of them and I am officially in love with her blog! As I was waddling about I discovered the Let’s Talk Bookish meme. I don’t normally like or do memes, however this weeks topic was just too interesting, for me to pass so here we are!

Related Blog Post: I actually wrote a post a few years ago on Why I Don’t Separate My Blog Life From My Personal Life whilst there’s a slight cross over, I would say both posts cover slightly different aspects to this topic. I would say these posts work well being read together but please remember, this post was written in 2018. I was a wee baby blogger back then, you could say this is an updated version of the post…where I’m more coherent xD

  

Why I Go By Clo And Not Chloe

(unless you’re a special peep who can full name me when I’m not behaving ahem hi soph, who regularly full names me ily)

In short I’m not a huge fan of Chloe. In my day to day life nearly everyone uses Chloe to address me, it’s rare anyone says “Clo” to me. At the start of my blogging journey I was seriously considering, going by my middle name of Eloise online, it’s still part of my name. It would also help create some separation. Back in the early days of me having social media I used @/eloisethewriter as my username so my middle name was already being used online. It made a lot of sense for me to use Eloise.

I didn’t. As you can all see by now, I chose to use my nickname for several reasons. Whilst Eloise is my middle, I don’t respond to it, whether verbally or written down. Whilst you are welcome to call me Chloe, I just feel like it’s overly formal? That line of thinking maybe because throughout my entire life only one teacher has ever used my nickname, my entire family have always called me Chloe so I am very used to my full name being used in formal settings I suppose. With friends though, I’m Clo or whatever other nickname you come up with for me.

For me personally there was already that distinction between Chloe and Clo for me to feel like I could go by Clo online and feel like that’s who I am. I may be called Chloe but I’m a Clo…without a h. (Chlo is another spelling of the nickname but I’m not a fan of it, the h just looks awkward but it’s ok if you typo it or mess up. I won’t tear you to pieces for using the h xD It’s literally just a pet peeve of mine)

I guess it came down to me wanting to be as true to myself as possible, I totally could’ve gone by Eloise, Chloe or picked a random name I liked. I admire all of you who do use a different name online because I literally would not respond. I go by Clo because that’s the name that resonates with me the most, just like purple is the colour I resonate with…and why purple is everywhere. if i could my blog would be all purple but no one needs to be attacked by all the purple

Balancing Bookish With Lifestyle

I am still trying to find this balance. I don’t post reviews on the blog, I may do again someday but right now, I’m happy without them. I don’t enjoy writing reviews. I do enjoy talking about book related topics, life related topics and overall connecting and helping my fellow booklovers. I personally love it when my favourite bloggers branch into other topics like lifestyle, all of us have various things to contribute to the world, to the internet. We are all knowledgeable in certain things and we’ve all experienced various things, I love reading about people’s uni experiences. I have no plans to go to Uni but I still love the posts.

As you can tell in the past, I do blog about my personal life, I share certain aspects of it on my blog. There’s a lot though that I won’t share on my blog. Some of it will be shared on a Discord server or in my close friends DMs because they’re close friends and sometimes we all need someone to turn to. I do have this fear that people won’t like my lifestyle content on this blog. I just keep reminding myself that people will connect to different parts of me, some may connect to a lifestyle post about self care whilst others may connect to a bookish post. Typically though when I make friends in the community/really love a bloggers blog, I will read pretty much anything they post.

Your blog is your space. Just be mindful that you do have an influence, your words can impact other people even if you’re a small blog.

Privacy

I think there’s this huge problem with sharing for validation and sometimes oversharing our lives on social media. I’m talking with the mass population, some of us will treat social media as a diary, the thing is..it’s not. Then there’s people who only show the highlights of their life, or a ‘highlight reel’ so to speak, which creates this illusion that their life is nothing but sunshine and rainbows. It can make the rest of us feel this need to post photos of certain parts of our own lives to feel validated. (if you do this, then hi I hope you know you shouldn’t be looking for validation in algorithms and the amount of likes a photo gets).

For some people their life is also their work, take lifestyle YouTubers for instance, they are creating content and sharing their life to make a living. I can’t imagine how hard it must be to figure out what aspects they should keep private and what aspects they should share. Do you share your relationship online or keep it private? Do you talk about your mental health struggles publicly online or not? How much should you let people in because once they’re in, it’s hard to get them back out.

With a blog I do feel like it’s easier to keep areas of your life private, we’re not video based, so the only way people can see what we look like, what our rooms and things look like is if we choose to post photos online. That’s a choice each of us must make. There’s no right or wrong way either, it’s your life and you need to choose how much you’re comfortable putting out there.

For me I’m comfortable sharing selfies, sharing photos of my room…I’m ok sharing photos of things I own because it’s mine. There may be certain things I share privately though, so only a select group of people are able to see it, they could still screenshot it but uhm they’re trusted friends so I would hope they wouldn’t.

So many of us live our lives through the lens, through a filter because we seek validation from likes, comments and retweets on social media. The only validation you need in your life is yours.

Ahem slight tangent but something I adore is watching the sunrise. I enjoy sitting in my garden and staring at the sky, enjoying the moment of just being alive. I don’t always share those moments, I may talk about them on social media. I may choose to take a photo sometimes of the sunrise…it depends. Sometimes I want those moments to myself.

The same applies to all aspects of our lives, you need to keep some things for yourself, for yourself and close friends/family. It’s ok to have privacy…I don’t talk about my work a lot. I do work, and I am working towards being a teaching assistant but I won’t talk about it all that much. Work life is private for me. That’s something I chose for now to keep private. My face is not private, it’s online and will be for the rest of the internets days.

I feel like this is a rather rambly post but as Soph once said ‘It’s not a Clo post without a ramble’ 😉 Do you use a pseudonym? How do you navigate what to share online and what not to? Let me know your thoughts down in the comments!

22 thoughts on “Why I Chose Not To Use A Pseudonym Online, Balancing Content On The Blog & Privacy

  1. 🙂 I do not use pseudonyms online; I use my actual name.

    As a general rule, I only share things that I know that I am not going to regret sharing later on.

    Also, I am not the only Renard Moreau on the planet; there are many of them who are of various ages, races and nationalities.

    Do enjoy the rest of your day!

    Like

  2. OMG. HOW DID I NOT KNOW YOUR NAME IS CHLOE?? XD
    Lmao you’ll always be Clo for me hehe.
    I stopped doing my wrap-ups for multiple reasons, one of them being the one yo mention. How do you know how much to share of your private life or not? I don’t mind discussing it on IG or twitter but somehow doing it on the blog makes me uncomfortable.

    Liked by 1 person

    • hehehe I am a Chloe 😜 yayyyy Clo for the win and yeah finding that balance for what to share can be really tricky. Particularly on a blog, since it’s basically out there for anyone to see whereas on twitter/instagram we at least have some control over who can see it so I totally get that! ❤

      Like

  3. Ouuuuuhh thank you for that, I’mma hop onto it for Monday’s post!!

    I kind of like reading stuff like that… while I tend to overshare and can’t really help myself – I also get paranoid about it 🙃 Still wondering what the “limit” is..

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I loved this post! 🥰

    I, like you, use a nickname but unlike you, mine is quite ambiguous. Most people irl use my full name but I like having this small separation online – it’s still me but it’s not quite the full me (if you wanna be all poetic about it 😅) & idk because I’m still in school it just gives me this extra layer of protection that someone wouldn’t immediately know it was me, like if you read a lot of my content then you could properly guess it was me but I’m hoping they’re not that dedicated 🤞😂

    I love reading lifestyle blogs as well! And sometimes it’s just a nice change to not read about books for once! Plus it’s always lovely to find out a bit more about the blogger behind the blog 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    • So glad you enjoyed the post El!

      Yesss I totally understand that, I think if I’d still been in school and not in college, it’s likely I’d have gone with say my middle name? Although it’s also very likely that it’d have been pointless because people in my school were nosy and would have probably found out about my blog anyway so there’s that. Yessss I’m just a curious person and I enjoy seeing a glimpse into people’s lives, their way of living and that then inspires me. It’s also, like you said, nice for a change to not be reading about books hehe.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. I LOVED reading this post CHLO! I love that you go by that nickname. It also suits your blogging name really well. Cuppa Chloe isn’t as catchy hehe. I also didn’t go by a pseudonym, and while I do love them, I do like having my name on my blog. It mostly just worked because of the alliteration haha. Rae is my second name so I just combined them all.

    ALSO yes do more lifestyle posts!! I love that. I’ve been trying to branch out with more movie posts as I think that’s fun. And totally agree with you keeping private and sharing what you feel comfortable with. Your life is your life and you’re in control of it.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Aaah I’m so glad you enjoyed the post Ruby! Phahaha yep when I was changing my blog name I knew I’d have to use my nickname anyway because ‘cuppa chloe’ just does not work in the same way. Aaaah I love your name it’s a lovely name 💜 also the alliteration is great!

      Eeeep more lifestyle posts are definitely in the works, I’m just struggling with having the confidence to post them at the moment hehe. Thank you so much for reading and commenting!

      Liked by 1 person

  6. I definitely understand the name thing! I got by Dani almost everywhere and when someone calls me Danielle it sends a cold sweat down my back! It just doesn’t feel quite right. I do think that if I ever write something I might use a pen name like D.A. Leclair or Alexis Leclair because I don’t really LOVE my first name.

    I do think I’m a “highlights reel” type of person since I tend to share big things in my monthly wrap-up. I only share the good things that happen to me just to add a little flavour. What fun games I played, if I went on vacation, what music videos I liked. I do agree though that too many people want “likes”. I tend not to share many photos of myself or any strictly personal blog posts because I don’t really feel like sharing day to day things with other people. I don’t think either way of sharing if wrong but I agree with you that there is value in choosing to keep certain things private.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yesss I totally get the cold sweat, I usually feel a jolt and my heart rate usually picks up if it’s someone online using my full name cause I’m like what did I do? xD Ooooo that’s pretty, I’ve always thought about using a pen name for writing but I don’t know if I would now? Maybe or I’d use my middle name probably because I do really like my middle name.

      I think there are times where I’m a “highlights reel” person but it’s very rare now…like on instagram I’m more likely to show the highlights but it really depends for me. Yep there’s a lot of value in choosing to keep certain things private, something I’m definitely having to relearn, since I grew up in a world where it’s normal to share every little detail of your life on social media 😅 Thank you so much for commenting Dani!

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Yes to all of this!!! DB’s been my nickname since school, and I just prefer using that – easier to pronounce/spell for other people (I either wait for someone else to introduce me or I tell them they can use my nickname (stuttering over DB is easier than stuttering over my first name). And now even my parents and sister use DB so often that when they use my first name it’s like… what do you want/what have I done? ahha
    It’s also really funny that the more older (😥) I get the more I prefer DB to my first name. I think it’s because I spend so much time online, using DB, so i hear/see it so often I respond to it more.

    I definitely thought of what I would go by when I started my blog. I didn’t realise I wanted to put my name in the blog name until I chose it – but I actually wouldn’t change it as it’s not fixed on book content, which means I’m free to delve into other types of content.

    I do think I might go with a pseudonym for when I eventually publish – mostly because the type of books i want to write will not really sit well with (most) of the people who know me in real life (unfortunately). I already use a ‘different name’ with poetry (just my middle name and my mom’s maiden name) so it’s not much of a problem (though I still haven’t come up with a pseudonym for books).

    Liked by 1 person

    • Ah thank you so much for your comment! Yeah I do prefer my nickname over my full name, like I still like “Chloe” but I feel more connected to “Clo” and always have done to be honest haha. Oooo yeah I mean I am still considering using a pen name if/when I publish and it’d most likely be a mix of my middle name and another surname from my family I’m not sure though. It’s definitely something that I still contemplate a lot hehe.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Over the years I think it’s also that you get more used to your nickname than your name – so like if someone actually uses my name, they either see it somewhere or they’re mad at me 😂
        Yeah! I sort of have an idea for my pen name, so I guess I’ll put it in the back pocket until I actually come close to publishing something.

        Liked by 1 person

  8. Hilariously enough, most people in my life call me Meegs, but because the spelling for Meeghan is so unique, I’ve just always been “Meeghan” on all my social media platforms. Which has its own positives and negatives.
    Firstly, I’m pretty sure that if you google “meeghan” and “canberra” I will likely be your first hit in the search. I’m pretty sure there are only 3 other “meeghan”‘s in Australia. One is in Sydney, one is in Brisbane, and one in Melbourne. Which is great if you’re looking for me, but bad if I don’t want you looking for me. Based off that search alone you can likely find out where I work and my surname, which then opens up a whole bunch of cans of worms.
    In saying that, this is 100% my own choice, but no, I’m not super anonymous.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. I loved reading this post, I always enjoy what other people decide to share or not about their life on social platforms. I don’t use a pseudonym, I actually use my real name (and sometimes I play around with it but keep it my own). I do not, however, share information about my personal life besides maybe studies or maybe pictures of my office space on Instagram (without personal pictures), I also don’t share pictures of my own face due to my line of work. Other than that, I do enjoy sharing overall thoughts about books and just things I enjoy in general 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Awh thank you Leyanis! I’m so happy you enjoyed my post and yes I enjoy what other people choose to share about their life online. Even the smallest things I enjoy, maybe because I just enjoy how it helps you get to know them better as a person? Of course sharing your personal life isn’t the only way to get to know someone and ooooo I love seeing people’s office spaces hehe. Thank you so much for reading commenting ❤

      Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.